I used to be, like most un-enlightened people, very reluctant to acknowledge that I believed in God. I believed in Santa Claus. I believed in the Tooth Fairy, and the Sandman, but couldn't bring myself to believe that Jesus was the Son of God.
It seems that I went out of my way to disrespect and disgust God, but it also seemed that He was unimpressed with my attitude and antics. It was like He already had me but I was too dumb to realize it.
I took a leave of absence from my job to work on a project in Washington, DC and before I left home to head that way, a friend told me about a book I should read entitled "The Late Great Planet Earth" by Hal Lindsey.
It was the most eye-opening book I had ever read.
First, I discovered that the people IN a church WERE the "Church" and the edifice itself was not worthy of adulation.
Second, and of infinite importance, was the discovery that was essential to my Salvation; Believing that Jesus was the Son of God, and that He was the "Sacrificial Lamb of God" who died so that my sins could be forgiven.
I have no doubt that that fact WAS taught to me in Catechism but the Catholic Church has a way to shoving things down your throat as kids which tended to deafen me to anything they had to say.
There was obviously much more in Mr. Lindsey's book and subsequent publications by him and others that got my attention.....and led me to becoming a "Born Again" Christian. I was 37 years old when I knew that I had become a follower of Christ.
The years have passed quickly and my efforts to learn about the Lord and how I might be able to help to spread His "Good News" have increased over those years. He clearly knew that, as an introverted, under-educated guy, I was not Preacher material.....so He gave me a toolbox full of skills and abillities.
Problematically, for me, He didn't bother to indicate how I should use what He gave me. I guess He left it up to me.
So, I had two choices. First, I could assume that God lost his marbles, but.....that was clearly not an option. Second, I could muddle along and try to do what I thought was right, and not offend the Lord while I was doing it. So, here we are.
It appears that God doesn't say a lot.....at least to me. But, I have an idea that He actually does.....I just don't pay attention. I believe that God, through His words in the bible, speak directly to me in ways that only a "believer" could comprehend.
For example, Non-believers are blinded to the fact that Jesus promised that whoever received Him as Lord and Savior would also receive the Holy Spirit of God. These Non-believers may not even believe in God, let alone that "believers" are blessed with the Holy Spirit.
I truly believe that. While I feel badly (and embarassed) that the Holy Spirit has to be with me every day and night monitoring my words, deeds, and thoughts, I believe that He (I hope it is a "he") works to get my attention about certain things. And, while acting like the fool I am, I tend to ignore many of the thoughts I have that might lead to me being able to accomplish my goals.
More and more, as I grow in Faith, I find that I "need" to write Christian-based things. I have been writing that sort of thing for decades but the urgency seems to have picked up. My doing.....or the Holy Spirit's influence?
It is important here to point out that, although I have a daughter who is an internationally published poet, I do not have a poetic bone in my body. Yet, one day a few years ago, I sat down and wrote the following poem.
A Tiny Voice
It was a tiny voice I heard, more like a thought than that of a word.
It was less than a whisper and barely was heard.
I have heard that voice for decades now.
It says what I SHOULD do, but never says how.
It assumes I know the difference ‘tween what is wrong and what is right,
and is constantly correcting me to bring me toward the light.
The light seemed very distant then, so very far away.
But through the years of listening, black & white replaced the grey.
As the light grew brighter, the path began to show,
that all of us must travel on to reach where we should go.
The destination we should want, through the gift of peace and love,
is to join our Heavenly Father who guides us from above.
We are ALL His children. The Bible tells us so!
(He gave the Bible to us so that everyone could know.)
His beloved Son was crucified as a sacrifice for all, so our sins would be forgiven....IF we only heed His call.
The tiny voice I heard back then, is now loud, and very clear. It says Jesus is the only way that we can get to God from here.
I will admit that there is no way I can prove that those words were inspired by the Lord or anyone else. I can assure you that they came from somewhere or someone other than me.
Do you suppose that it might be a coincidence that I wrote the poem shortly after I survived a nearly always fatal dissecting thoracic aortic aneurism? note #1
